Sometimes, you just need to hear three little words.

You know those days when your kid “accidentally” emptied the box of Lucky Charms on the counter because “I had to get the green marshmellow hats”….

Then you had no idea that you signed up for “entertainment” while eating breakfast when you catch a glimpse of your dog’s b-hole of fury explode on your lawn…

And it gets stuck in his fur…

Then you have to give him a bath…

Then your kid demands watching Tom and Jerry…

And you can’t find the T.V remote…

And you seriously debate whether or not this is deemed as one of those “This better be life-threatening” phone calls to your husband’s work…

Then you figure it out only to get confused by how to actually change the channel…

And you start jacking up the tint, brightness, contrast and whatever else is in the menu button…

Then you give up and start on laundry instead and find your husband’s boxers (that have holes in the crotch so big that you begin to question if his farts are contributing to global warming) gets wrapped around the washer drums.

And then you spend roughly 10 minutes trying to detangle them…

And then you throw them out…

Only to find them in the laundry basket again in a few days…

Because your husband fished them out…

They are his “favourites” you know…

Then your Dad calls to talk to you about insignificant things like going to the graveyard to visit your dead grandparents and constipation…

You can read more at All Work And No Play Makes Mommy Go Something Something

While I find it very disheartening that we've had barely any snow to cover up the massive amount of dog poop-age out in the back yard, I'm kind of thankful...

...because putting on Chunky's boots are a bitch.

There are a lot of  difficult things that other parents have warned me about like how it's difficult to get your child to eat vegetables, or how it's difficult to brush their teeth, or how it's difficult to get them to take  nap.

But no one, NO ONE warned me about how difficult it is to put friggen boots on a kid.

It's like putting boots on a limp noodle.

Then once their foot passes to the ankle part of their boot, they curl their toes and stiffen their feet.

What the hell?

I've learned a few things about putting on boots, and because I am not like those "other" parents who didn't warn me about boots, I'm going to share my helpful tips with you.

#1. Show the boot who's the boss.

#2. Beg child to help you put the boot on.

 #3. Lay the child down on the floor. Proceed to shove the boot on. Remember: Kids are resilient so put your weight into it.

To read more of this post and to link up your own Secret Mommyhood Confession please head over to All Work And No Play Makes Mommy Go Something Something

Every Saturday I host a meme called Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday. It's where us Mom's dish the real dirt on parenting. I would love it if you'd all like to join in!! Here is my entry for today:

I am really sickened by all the toys my child received over the holidays.

We are extremely blessed that Shawn and I were able to give Chunky a wonderful Christmas.

Our entire family and friends did too.

But there was a line that was crossed.

A line that separates being blessed to being grossly spoiled.

Chunky was spoiled.

He is the first grandchild in my family. The first nephew. The first child in our circle of friends.

All of them bought him something or a lot of somethings.

I can sit here right now and look at the toys scattered across my basement floor and spans throughout the entire house.

You can read more of this post at All Work ANd No Play Makes Mommy Go Something Something.

I hope to see you all there!

I'm super excited that Chunky finally realizes the seriousness of being naughty or nice this Christmas season.

And I'm using it to my parental advantage.

"Chunky, did you feed Champ your socks? Santa will be very upset with you if your Daddy has to pull another sock out of Champ's b-hole." 

"That's it, I'm calling Santa and telling him that you refuse to wear pants."

"Santa can hear you every time you fart and blame it on Mommy. He doesn't like liars."

"Chunky, I'm going to take a shower. An uninterrupted one. That means that you have to stay out of the bathroom and play in the living room. And don't you dare take the ornaments off the tree because Santa is watching you. If he sees that you're playing with the ornaments, he'll fly down from the North Pole and give you an ass that's redder than his suit."

"Santa is allergic to peanut butter. So you better get your hands and face out of the peanut butter jar and wash your hands before you paint the house with it. If Santa touches peanut butter he'll die. You don't want Santa to die do you?"

You can read more at All Work And No Play Makes Mommy Go Something Something

PS. This is a regular meme on my blog. If you'd like to participate, it is every Saturday beginning in the New Year. I look forward to seeing you link up!!!

As many of you know, one of my closest friends is expecting her first little one at the end of this week! I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am!

I made my very first diaper cake and <a rel="nofollow" href="http://www.plan-the-perfect-baby-shower.com/baby-sock-rose.html">baby sock rose bouquet</a>! I must say, they came out pretty friggin' great since I don't have a crafty bone in my body! LOL! I thought I would share a couple of pics with you!

 I hope you enjoy!

Click HERE to check out the rest!
 

Do you think that is his real name?" I asked my best friend quietly.She stifled the laugh begging to escape her lips as the sales clerk straight out of GQ walked away.

"I'm not sure." She responded back quietly.
 

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